Elyse - My Strength

As many of you know, I am training for my first triathlon. Learning how to run is probably the hardest thing I have ever undertaken. As I was starting to run, I would always think about Elyse. I would think about her determination, her perseverance, and her positive outlook on life. Despite everything she had been through physically, she was so strong. She never complained, never let it take over her life, and never let it bring her down. Every time I would think about her, my immediate pain seemed less – and so much less important. She gave me the determination to finish, determination not to give up.

One of the only times Elyse and I ever chatted about her heath she said something to me that I will never forget – you can’t let something like cancer take over your life – because if it does, the cancer wins. Although her body gave out, Elyse never gave up. The cancer never took over her life because she didn’t let it – she lived her life the way she wanted to – full of life, and focused on living.

A few weeks ago I went on a bike ride. I took a wrong turn and ended up on one of the steepest possible roads. Every time I thought I was close to the top, I would turn a corner to see another hill in front of me. As I took the last turn to get to the top, I was drained. I was just about to get off and walk, when a nice cool breeze came up behind me and help push me to the top. I would like to think that Elyse had something to do with it.

I am now just 3 weeks away from the race. She was with me in the beginning, has been with me every time I trained, and she will be with me as I cross the finish line. She will be with me every single stroke I take in the water, every rotation of my pedals, and no doubt, every time my foot hits the pavement. She will be with me – giving me the strength I need to finish and cheering me on.

I am so lucky to have Elyse’s friendship in my life. I miss her dearly, but know she will always be with us everywhere we go. May we all find strength in Elyse’s memory to make us better people and live life to the fullest.

Prayers in Greece

A friend of mine just returned from a trip to Greece. Upon her return she mentioned that she lit a candle for Elyse in every Greek church she could find. The photo is a small church on Mykonos where there is a candle burning in Elyse's memory.

Thanks Debbie.

Random Thoughts From Botts

The first thing I would like to say about Wheezie is that when it comes to Courage, Strength, Dignity, and Class there is no equal.

I always thought that I was a “Tough” person but as I get older (Yes older than Ross) I complain about a lot of aches and pains and then I think about Wheezie and I realize that I am just a big “Wuss”.

Some of the things I will miss most:
*Her “Shocking” personality.
*Country Swing Dancing with me in Sun Valley. (What a sight that was)
*Watching her face as Ross rode the “Mechanical Bull” in Sun Valley.
*How she always made me feel good about myself.
*The way she could slap me on the ass. (Sorry Ross)
*The way she would flirt with everyone.
*Her love of Rap and Hip Hop Music.
*The way her presence would light up a room.
*Her smile.
*The way that she cared for Ross.
*The way that she cared for all of us.
*Probably the thing that I will miss most is the smile on Ross’s face when she was around.

Wheezie you will always be in our hearts.

Love You Whitey.


Botts

Elyse

With Elyse it was always about presentation. She would put ice cream sandwiches on a silver platter and walk around like Vanna White tempting everybody to take one. She, similarly, was an excellent pusher of Jello shots.

“Denied, denied, accepted!”

You could always count on Ross and Elyse to show up late and stay ‘til the end, whether it be for tailgating and a football game or just a friendly BBQ and beer night.

Not many live up to the rule “If you haven’t got anything nice to say, then don’t say anything at all.” Elyse always had something nice to say.

You could count on Elyse for a bum slap/smack/pinch.
Who else could wrap up a “ball-sack” for the hit gift at the holiday party? The ball-sack continues to be passed along, reminding us of Elyse’s wonderfully unique sense of humor.

Did someone say “Peyronie’s?”

Elyse always had a good story about some reality show half of us have never even heard of.

Elyse always enjoyed getting Ross his plate. Never once did I see her sneak a tomato on there, or bitch about it, or even suggest that he get his own damn plate. She set a standard the rest of the guys can only dream about, and the rest of the women could never accomplish.

Gina & Graeme

The Bright White Flash

There you are.
I see you in your legacy of kindness.
You shared your time so generously
Family, friends, Oski, all of us had plenty of room in your huge heart.

There you are.
I see you in the smiles of those you left behind.
We talk about our memories of you…
Your dance moves, your careful clean ups, your knack for finding the perfect gift.

There you are.
I see you in our children.
You loved each one like your own.
First steps, first words, funny stories, and birthday parties, you shared in our joy.

There you are.
I see you in this city.
You soaked it in and left your mark.
Your church, the U, the mountains, the restaurants, the shops, your work - you loved it all.

There you are.
I see you in my heart.
You touched it so gently and permanently.
You taught me about strength, discretion, compassion, loyalty, and real listening.

There you are.
I see you in the stars.
A bright white flash of beauty.
You came, inspired us, lit up our lives, and were gone far too soon.
~Carrie Reilly

Social Butterfly / Psychologist

I think the term "Social Butterfly" was created as soon as Elyse learned to speak. Growing up with her she had friends within every clique. Whether it was the jocks, smokers hall, cheerleaders or nerds - Elyse was in the know of each group. It didn't end in Jr. High and High School though. There are many, many friends that wouldn't have met, dated or married each other without her introductions. Soundoff, the U, Greek row, co-ed softball, tailgating, Kappa alums. She brought us all together yet made each of us feel the most special in her life.

On a more personal note, I am terribly missing my phone chats with Elyse. I talked to her about anything and everything and I would hang up feeling so much better about my current situation. She was a fabulous psychologist to me and should have charged me money for all of the counsel over the past 29 years. Her advice is too numerous to list but from the biggies like kids and business ownership to the small tidbits like facial products and clothes, she could handle it all.

Here is a great thought she shared with some of us recently that I thought would be good to post:
"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...
It's about learning how to dance in the rain"

She's looking out for us

I shared the news of Elyse's death with some of my friends at my old job at MMI. They all remembered her as I hired her to create some gift baskets for guests on one of our travel programs. Of course, she went above and beyond and did the most lovely boxes of lotions and bath products, even repacking them when they were a little large to trek to Costa Rica, and taking the new boxes to my boss's house on a Saturday before his flight! Anyway, that was Elyse, she took such pride in her work and did a fantastic job.

The point of this long-winded story is that a close friend of mine there remembered Elyse so well and was quite affected by her passing. She's about to turn 39 and realized she's been putting off getting a mammogram for awhile. She made an appointment for one and convinced her friend, who's the same age, to do the same. Well, right after they talked about Elyse her friend found a lump in her breast, and went to the doctor who found one more. They were biopsied yesterday (I haven't heard any news on their status.) I like to think that Elyse was there and through her memory may have saved her first life. I have been struggling with ways to make her death mean something, and maybe this is small but it's a good way to start.

A few of my favorite things in no particular order

* her dance moves (see photo for "The Sprinkler")
* specifically, the way she sometimes danced like the animated monkeys during the closing credits of the movie Madagascar- she loved it when I showed them to her
*the way she took food orders quite professionally at my bbqs
* how I could talk to her about my brushes with cancer
*the way she twirled her body when taking a cut at a slowpitch softball
*the way she apparently convinced Ross that they were ever 15 min late to anything (try 30!)
* Her love of the mafia in books, tv, movies

Kappas Forever

May 28, 2008

Dear Ross,Our love and sympathy go out to you and Elyse's family during this difficult time. Elyse was not only my cousin, but my sister as we were both Kappas. We all love her dearly and that will never end. She will live forever in our hearts and minds as a beautiful, elegant and amazing woman. May family and friends bring you comfort. All my love,

Erin & The Prescott Family (Seattle, WA)

Her Gift...

Elyse had a gift for making feel good. She had a way of making people feel good about themselves and their situation and always focused on the positive. In the 29 years that I was lucky enough to have her in my life - she found the silver lining to every cloud.

Comments made repeatedly when reminiscing about Elyse:
"Elyse made me feel special."
"Elyse always gave me 100% of her attention when talking with me."
"Nothing was more important than "you" when she was talking to you. "
"No" did not exist in her vocabulary.

Elyse loved you for you - unconditionally!
She was a confidante, a best friend, a party girl, a diva, a healer, a social worker, a cowgirl, a Charlie's Angel, a wine connoisseur, a goofball, and a girl with a million nicknames; Eunice, Enis, Flash, Easy E, LC, Phoebe, Wheezie, Sloan, to name a few......

The glass was always more than "half full" with Elyse - It was filled to the brim!

Email from Marley Prescott (Ross' Cousin)

Hi-

A cloudy day here in Seattle-thought I would drop a note as I am thinking of you....I really enjoyed seeing you and being a part of Elyse's memorial. I just want you to know that I am so proud of you-your strength and courage during these past few years but most of all what a wonderful best friend and husband you were to her. She is and was a very lucky lady to have you with true and lasting love!

The two days that I was there I could just see the love around you and Elyse -her family and their support and your dear friends. Everything was just done so well and you thought of everything. I think because you knew her so well-having her friends around her, your pink tie, the pink balloons, her Kappa key dear to her heart, a few pieces of Oski, and the great picture of you and Oski...
I know the days will be hard and long but just take a day at a time-one foot in front of the other. Just know that "Barb":) is there and that your dear friends are always there- and all the Prescott's:) just a flight away-

Really enjoyed being with you and I hope each day becomes brighter-

Love,

Marley

My Condolences

Ross:

I am very sorry to hear of the passing of your wife. I cannot imagine the impact this must be having on you and your family. Please let me know if there is anything I can do to be of help.

The entire CBC organization's thoughts and prayers are with you and you family.

Rick

Rick Davidson
President and COO
Coldwell Banker Commercial Corporate Headquarters

Ten Things I Miss About Her Already

1. Her Smile
2. Her Spanikopita
3. Her Love for Me
4. Never taking the freeway if there was a slower way to get there
5. "15 minutes late" isn't really being late
6. Can we watch "Dancing with the Stars?"
7. Never putting her needs above yours
8. Fabulous
9. Constant positive energy and outlook
10. Her

Email from Ingrid Wood (Erik's Mom)

Hi everyone,

I went to Salt Lake City yesterday for one day to attend Elyse's funeral service in the Church, the service at the graveside and returned to the Church again for the celebration of her life which included a wonderful Greek meal.

When we arrived in Salt Lake City it was beautiful warm day with a great view of the still covered snow mountains. I never knew that Salt Lake City was such a beautiful city. Scott Rice, his wife and Mike Lucey rented a car and I went with them. Salt Lake City is so spread out and hardly any traffic. Since we arrived so early we had breakfast downtown.

Then we drove to the "Prophet Elias Greek Orthodox Church". Erik and Beth arrived at the same time who had flown in from Los Angeles. We met Barbara in the entrance hall and were introduced to so many people. The Church was full.

The service was one hour long. The first part was all singing by three men and it was followed by a sermon done by Father Michael K. who spoke so eloquently about Elyse, her life and referring to many bible passages. He never said that Elyse had died but rather said at different times that she was sleeping. He also said that she lived one year longer then our Savior Jesus Christ. Elyse lived for 34 years. Even though this was a short time to live but years don't count to leave a mark on others, it counts what you you do with the years. Elyse did leave a mark during her 34 years on earth.

Copied from (the back) the brochure given to us in Church:

The angels brought
Elyse into the world.
We got to love her
and be loved by her for 34 years.

Now the angels have come
to take her to a better place,
but our love for her
will be forever.


We drove to the Mount Olivet Cemetery for the graveside service. Since Memorial Day was just a few days before the cemetery was covered with flowers. We did not see flags just flowers and flowers. The grave site was in a beautiful location, a big birch tree which had a graceful weeping form was right next to it. We were given pink balloons and another shorter service was done by Father Michael K.

Ross, Barbara and Elyse's family were sitting on chairs and did well. We were standing all around them. The time came for us to release the helium filled pink balloons. It was a beautiful sight when they went up. One balloon got caught in the branches of the birch tree above the grave and Ross freed it and the balloon went up to Heaven. Members of the family and friends were given single red roses to put them on Elyse's coffin. Barbara gave me a white tulip to take home. I have it pressed between pages of my book. We all were invited for a celebration of Elyse's life and were asked to meet the families again back at the Church.

We returned to the Church and gathered in the big Church Hall. A sit down meal was waiting for us. The round tables were so nicely set with linen and roses in vases on every table. The family and guests celebrated the life of Elyse in a beautiful way. The mother and the grandmother of Elyse said to me that the way we Greek people do it. The buffet style Greek lunch was delicious, wine, beer and even brandy was offered with the dessert.

It was a joy to see how much love Elyse had created in her short life. Ross and Barbara were surrounded with everyone who touched her life. It made it easier for them to say Good Bye and that Elyse's memory will live on forever.

Peacefully,
Ingrid